Free Fall

Across the hall

A frozen glance

That,

I still can recall.

Back of my mind

A hidden smile

That,

I did not care

To show at all

Toes curled,

Fingers twitched

In nervous fist

All so fast

All so subtle

That,

I noticed not,

My breath was

Stalled

To be touched

By his eyes

Burning

Skin with desire

Hold it close

In the heart

Eternity

or,

Nothing at all

Living,

Those moments

Again and again

Every fraction

Of every second

As

I recall

The stillness

And the free fall

All in the Name

Crushed again,

Burst again,

Something has changed,

Something isn’t same.

No, its not sour,

It isn’t pain,

I do not feel

Anything,

I feel all the same.

I see myself

Alone

On the check board,

Was I playing by my rules,

In someone else’s game?

Where is that smile

That lit my eyes?

Where is that tear,

That fell

Untamed?

Where is the anger,

That made me

Stammer?

Where is the zitter,

That I felt

In your name?

Where is the sense

Of belonging,

When I heard my name?

Not surreal,

just indifference..

Scattered in pieces,

with no acceptance..

All those days,

appear like dreams..

Far far off

Lost in the maze,

Of my mind

In my own game.

Why did I believe

That we would live,

To see the day

Come true,

for me and you..

But I still dream

with No night

of exception,

of u, of us

of our own terraine..

Every morning,

I call you names..

and I curse myself,

For being so lame.

Only if,

I could feel

The fall..

that I had

I would have told

How hurt I was..

But I,

am still floating

over the cross lane

Or, have I already

hit the rock bottom

and have lost all touch

Of reality,

Of being humane..

I do not blame,

you or me..

As confused,

I remain,

with nothing

ascertain...

but certainly I have lost

the game..

of love..

all in the name...

of love..

Yes, all in your name,

Trying to find

my identity..
My true name!!!