Friday, October 9, 2020

Beyond "The End"- Chapter 2

"Did you try Fakira? It used to be your mom's favorite place. I am surprised, its still there.

She couldn't help control her smile at the enthusiasm in her father's voice. He had been calling her every single day. She wasn't used to his calls. As far as she could remember, in all of her 30 years he would not have called her more than once or twice a months. Incidentally, her mother who used to speak to her everyday and more than once in a day; had not spoken to her since she had moved to this small town. She wasn't surprised a bit, she wasn't even angry, she probably understood the disappointment her mother must have felt because of the recent turn of events. She would ask her father every time, if Maa was around. Every time he would casually answer that her mother was busy doing something and she would call her in some time.

A week passed and she was getting used to this life in the small town. Going to work in the morning, wearing that yellow helmet for no reason and yet taking a pride in it. People wore a different kind of pride in their work. People here respected her as if she was someone. This wasn't Mumbai where she had worked for first 5 years of her life. Where she was part of a crowd and was virtually no one. In this town and in this company she was virtually no one but people around her acknowledged her and made her feel that she was someone.

She needed that. She needed that little dose of recognition, of acknowledgement and that small town feel to boost her moral. The time was moving at a strange pace. Some days it will feel like a distant memory and somedays it would remind her of that "life" like it was just yesterday. Her mother had started talking to her again though it was almost like past 5 years were completely erased from her mother's book. She never referenced anything, even remotely related to her life in Mumbai. 

Ammu asked her one evening, "Do you want to go to the club this weekend? It has been years since I have been to the club you know after your Uncle passed away. Vidhya was telling me that they are organizing some function this new year. We can also go the Book Fest on the way".

She knew that Ammu was making an effort to get her to socialize once again. It has been 6 months that she had moved in with Ammu. They had found comfort in the company of each other and past 6 months had really healed her to an extent. She liked the fact that Ammu never probed her and yet suggested and encouraged her in things that will get her out of the depression.

She agreed to go to Club as well as Book fair. She made a point that she will have to get Amu's car fixed one of these days. That night when she was making these notes in her mind, without realizing she slept with her lights on.

That night for the first time in the last 6 months, she had a dream...of him.

... Oh Neeru I am so happy that you are with me. I can't tell you how much it means to me. I never thought I'll see this day. The suddenly she was in a bridal dress and he was smiling at her. He wasn't the groom, he was just standing there smiling at her. She saw him and then she tried to look at the groom. She struggled in her dreams to look at the face of his groom. It was him. She was sure of that. But he looked different, he looked angry and it scared her. 

She woke up with a shiver. She was startled, anxious and scared. She thought she was crying in her dream but then she realized that she was still crying. She got up and had some water. As she was stitching off the lights in the room, she could see from her window that in the adjacent flat a fainted light was still on. She thought she saw someone or may be she imagined.

She struggled to sleep again and finally fell asleep as the blast furnace turned the sky orange in the early morning hours.